Vital Crewtistics

From the MOBO Magazine archive:

Many people thought that 2001 and the success of the award winning So Solid Crew was a passing phase. How wrong can you be? In musical chronicles 2002 will go down as the year of the crew and it’s days are far from numbered… MOBO takes charge and weighs up the crew appeal.

SO SOLID (Independiente)
How many members? Debatable, changes with the seasons/afro height and depends on how many newbies they recruit from the continent. More famed members include Mega ‘never without an afro comb’ Man, Romeo (um mine), Harvey (Mr Alesha Mis-teeq), Asher ‘banged up’ D, Oxide and ‘b-b-b bound for the reload’ Neutrino.
Most likely to say: We got so many haterz blud, messy blud, say how we gonna split this doe’ between all 967 of us blud?
Famous lyrics: Two multiplied by ten plus one, Romeo dunn!, I got 21 seconds t-t-t!
Interesting facts: Their debut album They Don’t Know went double platinum in two-and-a-half weeks, two members of So Solid are Cypriot recruits, Harvey was nearly a big league footballer, they’ve collaborated with Beenie Man on his new album, producer Mr Shabz, is the brother of one of The Reelists.
Chart successes to date: 21 Seconds, Ride Wit Us, Haterz, They Don’t Know.
Biggest selling single: 400,000 (21 Seconds)
Highest chart position: No. 1 (21 Seconds)
Most likely to pull: Most would argue Romeo (Harvey’s attached), but then who would turn down double trouble with the Twinz?
2002 Achievements: Friday night show on Kiss 100 FM, only one member got sent down, no one was cautioned for smoking cannabis, So Solid on the acclaimed Jools Holland show, they weren’t dropped after a year like most UK artists, their no-trouble appearance at Oxide and Neutrino’s MTV 5 Night Stand gig raising the question why are So Solid tours still banned?
Best quotes of 2002: “I got a lot of groupies but I just deal with it. I hear I got a lot of mums are into me too” (Romeo keeps it real), “my dreams are déjà vu blud, all of ‘em, everything we’ve done here has been predicted y’ get me” (Mega getting spiritual), “I’d love to get Moe on a track, he’s so underrated”, (Harvey quashes the rumours of any beef with Heartless Crew).

MORE FIRE CREW (Go Beat)
How many members? Only three, Ozzie B, Lethal B, Neeko, (sticking a tongue out to any one who thinks to be in a crew you need a Saddam style army).
Most likely to say: Oi! Who’s that More Fire Crew? Oi! Oi! Oi! Oi!
Best lyrics: Um… Oi! Who’s that More Fire Crew?
Interesting facts: They’re all under 21, So Solid have made a tune cussing More Fire (why? Who knows), Ozzie is the supposed cousin of Dizzee Rascal from The Roll Deep Crew, they’re all from Walthamstow, they met and learnt their trade at a community workshop,
Chart successes to date: Oi! Who’s that More Fire Crew?
Biggest selling single: 80,000 (Oi!)
Highest chart position: 8
Most likely to pull: Ozzie B because he knows the Sugababes who are bound to have lots of crew member-hungry friends. Also looks like he’s cute enough to introduce to your mother (rewind - my mother has just choked).
2002 Achievements: Did an advert for the government reworking vocals of Oi! to encourage people to vote, all got Avirex jackets, took the streets to Top Of The Pops, showed all those East London promoters that they were indeed worth more than £50.
Best quotes of 2002: “When this guy said nah you aren’t worth £50, we were in the studio and boy we were thinking about rhydims and decided to make a tune about it” (Lethal on the mindblowing inspiration for Oi!), “I don’t really like garage. You see our music is bashment not really garage. Just new flava’s” (Lethal sets the record straight cough cough), “would I do a duet with Britney? Yeh. I will do one with anyone,” (Neeko having a daydream), “We’re from the ghetto man but it doesn’t mean we are trouble.
Find something constructive to do - there need to be more facilities in the community” (Ozzie B gives the authorities a wake up call) “We aren’t down with free advertising. If you want me to wear Prada it’s cool but I’m keeping it” (Neeko – you tell them boy!).

THE HEARTLESS CREW (EastWest)
How many members? Three. Mighty Moe, Bushkin and Fonti. (A trend in small numbers is developing it seems fellow crew watchers!)
Most likely to say: Our hearts in a de music, it’s a crisp biscuit, yagga yagga yo.
Famous Lyrics: Hearttttt-lessssss we got it going on, original hype, we got the vibe ya’ll!
Interesting facts: Warmed up for D-12 and Eminem in Miami, Heartless are best described as a sound system as they play music from all genres (including Kylie classics), they all DJ, MC, produce, Moe is Arabic and a talented artist, Fonti, the main DJ, is grade 6 at guitar and was a barber during his school lunch breaks but wanted to be a Maths teacher, Bushkin used to be a Legal Clerk, Heartless Crew have a joint bank account and have shared ownership of a Space Cruiser.
Chart successes to date: Heartless Theme, The Crisp Biscuit Mix compilation.
Biggest selling single: 47,000 (Heartless Theme)
Highest chart position: 21
Most likely to pull: Well they’re always together so a hit for one is a hit for all.
2002 achievements: Signed to 1Xtra’s digital radio station, a rather nice album deal (rumoured at near half a million squidders!),
Best quotes of 2002: “The rules with us are simple. Manners, being courteous and having respect come above everything else” (Moe explains why they’re perfect husband material), “Anytime you put on music you can be rocking, which is why we say our hearts are in the music” (Fonti on the Heartless philosophy), “Have you seen Planet Of The Apes? Mad Max? Demolition Man? That’s what we’re moving towards. We are always looking to be together, with our wives and kids, We want a castle…it could be a commune I suppose” (Bushkin on the Heartless empire).